floral madness: we do the work, you have the fun, NOT!

Florist-

we've met with the florist, Laurie, a second time, she kept us there over an hr and the first time it was two hrs. she is something of a nitemare in that she rambles and just when you make a decision, she throws out a whole bunch of new options and knit-picks the tiniest details leaving you feeling stressed, frustrated, and overwhelmed.

we had made the decisions for the most part in the first meeting, a TWO HOUR long meeting, and when we went back this past wkend, for a second meeting...she decided she wanted to go over every single idea that i had pointed out as "pretty" from our first meeting a few mos ago!!! unf***ing believable!! both jimmy and i just looked at each other, almost laughing knowing we were trapped.

laurie would not hear of the fact that we knew what we wanted NOW and went thru every single thing we had said we liked as a possibility from that first meeting. we made headway but we felt she made everything more complicated and decided that we need yet another meeting with her. she is stretching out her time with us for as long as she can and decided to save the 3rd meeting to draw up a new contract for us.

btw, we've stuck with the same bouquets for the wedding party and boutonnieres for all, like i had expressed in an entry a while back.

we experimented with the bowls jenni let us use, with stones and water and floating candle and just added an order of three different colored orchid blooms to have float over each floating candle bowl. there should be approx. 8 bowls to 8 tables.

we decided on a floral arrangement of different orchids for the head table of wedding party. possibly an autumn inspired centerpiece for reception table like pic i shared previously in od. or something with butterfly on it as display

quick picture of experimental clear bowl where u put rocks, petals and floating candles in with water. in my pix below there is no water in bowl, and orchid blooms are MISSING, so just imagine what it might look like, pretend there's water and petals floating on top LOL





...and for the altar we are leaning towards a mix of gladiolas in a coral color, orchids and other misc floral as filler, but it's not definite yet.

along the aisles there may be bows of ivory tulle or satin to decorate every few rows with a small 3-rose arrangement with ivy in the chapel where our marriage ceremony will take place with pastor.

ps

here were some ideas i brought to florist this past wkend, printed off weddingchannel.com just for ideas of style and color in flowers + wedding trends. this seemed to make her more frenzied and more scattered. it was her who told me to bring even the vaguest ideas in, via picture to give her a better hold on my personality and style except that caused her to go into overkill mode and lose focus. jimmy said i ought to have not brought any of it in because it only seemed to add to her hyperactivity and her odd ability to keep us there for an incredibly lengthy period of time over something that seems like it should be so simple LOL


Altar Ideas:

Centerpiece Fall Idea:



Some Bouquets:

btw, this is her card, note the motto. it's so NOT true. the reverse is true- we do all the work and she has all the fun LOL

its sooo hilarious in a sarcastic way. heh

floral + stress.

This entry was written prior to last weekend- on Wed. July 30th as days off are consumed by wedding planning and finding some downtime to recover from all the stress. That is why I haven't been online much friday to sunday as of late.

It is because every second of our time is filled with obligations, appts, and a wanting to just vegetate once the day is over as its been exhaustive. Add home hunting on top of all this-- and the stress is just BRUTAL. That's been frustrating and depressing too but guess what? I think Jimmy is beginning to wake up after seeing some close friends over the wkend- who just had their first baby and gave him some wise tips and advice over the weekend which back up what I have been saying to him all along (but he chose to ignore).

I WILL most definitely share a full update on the above paragraph, full detail of the house hunting dilemma and how his friends pretty much validated everything I had tried to say to him in the future. HA! Feels great to be validated and say -Told you so!!

So, here is latest wedding update which was written about a week ago!

Jimmy booked the photographer LAST Monday and put down the 535 deposit. We will be going to Citrus Park Publix floral dept on Friday and have an appt at 2pm- they do do weddings.

Note, he wrote me this last week:

Hi babe,
I just got off the phone with Randy at Celebrations and booked the photography, DJ, and music for the ceremony. I told him that we'll stop by sometime to listen to the different music selections they have. It ended up costing $1605 including tax, so I paid $535 for the deposit and the remaining balance is $1070.

I also talked to a lady at Publix (Apron's) and scheduled an appointment for the flowers at 2:00 pm on Friday. She said they normally have appointments up until 6:30 pm, but I didn't want to have to rush over there after work especially since I don't normally get home until 6:15 pm as it is and don't know if I may have to work late.

Well, I hope you got some rest. I probably won't stop by storage until I pick you up if you think your photos will be ready. Let me know if you talk to them and they still aren't ready and I'll get the book (and any others) that sold.
Love,
Jimmy





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Oh, we've put in our Wedding Invitation Order last weekend - it was over $200. [The proof came today via email and we will receive them at the end of August- we only ordered 75 invites.)
We are very behind and Jimmy has been stressed over being behind and money but I kept warning him we needed to do things and he ignored me. He likes to say he never wanted a formal wedding and I was the one- so things have been tense and I blew up over that over the weekend before last weekend.

It IS hurtful because he keeps rubbing it in my face everytime he is stressed [esp when my dad acted how he did-didn't want my mom helping us much financially with wedding. So now J feels funny around dad and seems to resent me even more because of how my dad humiliated him and it is as if he wishes he never committed to having a formal wedding becos of my dad and how he acted etc.) This is simply NOT fair to me and it has got me completely stressed out! I am caught in the middle. I can't help what my dad did and it's really not my fault. I have no control over what others say or do, regardless of blood ties. I feel like my dad has screwed up Jimmy's chance of being close to him or having a good relationship and it really upsets me inside but I can't really talk to anyone because all the ones I would talk to are involved (mom/dad jimmy)and it just seems I have been put in the middle against my will. I resent this and feel agitated/upset over the entire thing. It should not be like this.

All this makes me feel my fiance's heart isn't into this wedding planning and makes me realize that he is NOT appreciative of what a special day this will be. He has no idea that everything we are doing to make this wedding a reality IS preparing us for the real meaning of marriage and that this is an exercise on how well we work together as a couple, and gives us a tiny idea of what it is like to conquer hardships/stress/ in life as well as what its like to make plans, set goals and to compromise as a couple as we will need these skills during our marriage and future life together. This is preparation and a build up to something so meaningful and its a once in a lifetime thing, a learning experience that is beyond valuable to our future together.

His attitude has been the wrong one and hurt me lately because this should be a gift of his love to me and instead of complaining and making me feel guilty for having a wedding, he should be supporting me in this and appreciating all we're doing to make this special for him. Not to mention love IS making the other happy not thinking ONLY of yourself. Love is not selfish..but he is immature and self-absorbed. He cannot see past anything but the money aspect and how it is taking up all his precious selfish social time.

It just makes me sad and feel resentment that he doesn't care about what this means to me + has to act like an immature child throwing a tantrum and only thinking of himself. He doesn't seem to realize how special this day will be.

I feel like he is going to regret his actions when that day comes and he is moved by the ceremony and everything at the wedding. He will be sorry and I have warned him of this very thing - in a recent outburst/ fight.

Jimmy has promised to try to be more supportive but I have felt very overwhelmed and stressed, constantly upset as he is trying to cram us buying a home before Oct. 1st to make the deadline before the FHA loan expires and to move in everything before the wedding.

I think trying to find a first home and having to move in right before the wedding is a BIG mistake. I feel it is TOO stressful for me and I have tried explaining this to him. I cannot handle both moving and a wedding!!!! It IS stressful enough as it and I fear that my mental state of being will not be able to handle this much stress. I am drained with everything going on and it IS over his head. He thinks I can toughen up and get over it but I cannot.

We had a fight over this yesterday. I am resigned. He wants what he wants even if it causes me distress and doesnt want to hear how I feel or consider me. He says he will try his best to minimize stress for me in house hunting but the last several mos have been high stress and the closer it gets to him all panicked over this house loan deadline, the more frenzied and stressed everything will be. He just does not get it!! It is purely logical common sense.

He doesn't want to wait and is convinced he will NEVER be able to buy a home if he misses this Oct 1st 2008 deadline as they are doing away with FHA. I feel that is a ridiculous and irrational line of thinking and he is allowing fear to control him and it is impairing his judgement severely.

Jimmy has a good job and good credit. I've seen people on welfare get homes with tons of kids. But whatever!!!! He feels he knows more than I do. It is a waste of breath to say otherwise.

I just hope things get less stressful cos I am overwhelmed right now and my mood swings are increasing because I have no psych medication and no psych who will treat me with my insurance so I am really struggling :(

Next I am going to share some pix I copied from the white chapel website where our wedding will be held. These give an idea of how some people decorated the chapel for the ceremony and also how they chose to do the reception room.

Jimmy still needs to talk to Janice to find out the amount of chairs/tables and what color or how they look. I hope it is in a neutral color because in one of the pix the chairs were bright tropical green and that wouldnt match our wedding colors of ivory, champagne and lilac!!

Update: WELL Jimmy talked to Janice last wkend. Turns out chairs are a bright bluegreen color- so this will NOT do. Jimmy is the one who called her and talked out things while I was asleep over the past wkend. He told me that he got a recommendation from the chapel/reception coordinator [Janice] for linen seat covers for our chairs and that it was a really reasonable price so he said we will go with that, at 3.50 a chair plus they do set up for you. We are estimating approx 8 tables, give or take and I think 8 tables holds an estimate of 8 people to one table. We needed to find out that information for other various wedding planning appts such as florist and for when we start shopping at michael's for arts/crafts DIY wedding decorations and party favors since that seems to be the more affordable route to go at this point!!

Here are the picture examples in chapel + reception hall at White Chapel in Palm Harbor:

CHAPEL FLORAL ARRANGEMENT IDEAS (see examples below from past weddings there:)








(two different styles from different weddings- it appears)






RECEPTION HALL IDEAS (for floral arrangements in hall and at tables:)

(those hanging bouquets (with lights or mini chandaliers) are unique but don't know if we could do this, how expensive it might be, and J thinks it looks too complex and we should stick to simple. but I like unique. We'll see, I suppose.)



+++

Thinking further and more in term of the bridal party bouquets and what I want..after some net surfing and research, here are some floral bouquet trends this year that I would most consider for my own potential bouquet for this wedding.

In all honesty, I am most drawn to the second one. This is mostly because I think there will be gold in my colors based on possible accessories. It depends if i go with necklace and shoes I am thinking of. This is of uncertain yet and I am hesitant as I don't really like gold all that much in terms of jewelry- I prefer white gold or silver to yellow gold so this could change and is very up-in-the-air at the moment!

BOUQUET TRENDS

ballerina bouquet:

our wedding floral plan of action!

we had a meeting with florist at publix also. it was overwhelming and a few hr appt as everything had to be picked from scratch. we're thinking of going with [for bouquets] roses with hyperium berries with hand tied cut off stem bouquets [dont know correct wording] its still a roughdraft idea. but i think the bridesmaids will have lollipop colored roses which are similar to coral color..and mine will be ivory/creme. its just an idea that we're playing with currently.

[jimmy called the chapel/reception coordinator and we will be able to use those floating candle dishes jenni let us borrow for the reception tables in lieu of florist centerpieces for each tabletop. ]

we were thinking of going with orchid arrangements [in lt yellow, lt green and melon-reddish variations for the majority of tables/reception area but thats up in the air still.] and looking at an asian looking style plant or orchid with butterflies for main altar display or something like this. again, those are rough ideas we need to still think over before making a final decision. the florist hasnt been reserved yet but doubt we will find another place more reasonable in price. the charge isn't much to have it delivered so we may opt for that as they bring everything to the place and help set up, possibly. im not sure- so much info was thrown out that we both walked out of there stressed and exhausted!!

without the pricing of the petals used in floating dishes, the wedding table floral centerpiece, cake table or guest table floral arrangement, altar arrangements and roses along church aisles, the price is estimated at 379.00 only including bouquets, boutoinneires and corsages. it doesn't get any cheaper than that. that was close to what my first wedding cost for florals in the mid 90's and my ex and i went thru the same company twelve years ago. so you aren't going to find any cheaper than 300.

i expect it to be under or close to five hundred maybe in the four hundred range when all is said and done. ive purposely chosen cheaper flowers. lilies and stefanolis [unsure of correct name/spelling] that i was often drawn to wanting to choose go up into the hundreds and thousands for just bouquets. you'd have to be rich so i've settled for roses/orchids which are way cheaper.

below is a roughdraft of the itinerary plan we mapped out together on a computer screen with our appointed florist:

after hours of catalogue browsing and speaking with florist at citrus park publix which specializes in wedding florals, we came away with these highly possible ideas:

bridal bouquet: 9 vendella creme/ivory roses with green Hypericum berries hand tied with creme ribbon 3/4 down

matron of honor & bridesmaid bouquet: 5 lollipop roses with peach Hypericum berries

boutonnieres: groom: vendella ivory/creme rose & green Hypericum

best man, groomsmen & ushers: lollipop rose with peach Hypericum

mother of bride & groom + grandmother: cream spray roses [can choose either corsage for wrist or corsage to pin to dress]

church altar for ceremony: two potted arrangements, altar arrangement plant- asian style or orchid with butterflies in design/plant, possible unity candle flower arrangement; pew arrangements with a few roses along aisles

reception: 8 centerpieces [if 8 tables- dependent upon number of guest b/t 50 and 75 people but won't know til rsvps are received later down road: possibly floating clear glass dishes with stones, orchid petals and votive candles for each table.